


Something To Hold On To

by Magnetism_bind



Series: The Anchor [2]
Category: Black Sails
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Developing Relationship, Established Relationship, Lack of Communication, M/M, Multi, Relationship Issues, Tumblr Prompts, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-06
Updated: 2017-06-06
Packaged: 2018-11-09 17:35:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11109501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magnetism_bind/pseuds/Magnetism_bind
Summary: One week into the voyage to France and it's not going well.





	Something To Hold On To

 

One week into the voyage and Thomas is privately rethinking his previous assessment. It wasn’t completely incorrect; interesting is most assuredly one word for how the voyage is passing. It’s also difficult and frustrating and on the verge of completely intolerable. James is barely talking. They take their meals and they lie stiffly in the bunks at night and they wait for France.

Silver skulks around the cabin, keeping his head down. He’s still well known on the high seas, so it makes sense for him to stay out of sight as much as possible, but it also means James stays away from the cabin during the day as much as possible. 

Thomas finally corners him up on deck near the prow. None of the crew is around and they need to talk. James doesn’t acknowledge his presence at first, then finally says.

“What is it?”

“Why are you doing this?” Thomas asks in the most patient voice he can. It wasn’t his idea to bring Silver along and he’d thought…well, let’s just say he had thought matters would be different aboard the ship.

“Doing what?” James doesn’t meet his gaze.

Thomas sighs. “Why did you bring him along if you’re just going to avoid him?”

“What else was I supposed to do?” James grips the railing tightly. “I…I couldn’t leave him there.” He bites his lip, teeth sinking hard into the firm flesh in agitation. “I can’t have the conversation I _know_ I have to have with him aboard a ship.”

“And why’s that?”

“Because one of us will end up going into the sea.” James says flatly.

Thomas represses his sigh this time. He places a hand on James’s, just a brief squeeze. “It doesn’t have to be like this.”

“Oh?” James turns his head to look at him then. “And how should it be?”

There’s something ugly in his tone that Thomas doesn’t like, but it’s something that he recognizes, though it takes him a little while. It’s the sound of James when he’s jealous, when he’s thinking something is being taken away from him, when he’s afraid of losing something that he cares about, something that matters. Thomas just isn’t sure what he thinks is in danger this time. 

“James.”

“Leave it for now.” James says brusquely.

 *  *  *

So Thomas does. He wants James to talk to him voluntarily, not because Thomas is forcing him to. Nothing good will come of doing that.

So he returns to the cabin, where Silver is lying on his bunk on his back, one arm above his head, the other tapping a restless tattoo on his stump. He glances at Thomas when he enters, but says nothing.

Thomas eyes him. “Why did you agree to come?” 

“What else was I supposed to do?” Silver answers, gazing at the roof.

That phrase again, echoed in James’s voice.

_Just fucking talk to each other._

Silver sighs and stretches his arms above his head. James watches the pull of his arms and the motion of his chest. The memory of that night, of Silver pressed back against him is fading. And Thomas doesn’t want it to fade. He had hoped it would lead to more, to be the beginning of something, something that it obviously has already begun, but James hasn’t even mentioned it beyond that first day on the porch. Instead now he’s acting as though that conversation never happened. Silver is obstinately keeping his distance as though his desire for something might cause the temporary truce between them to rupture, if there even is a truce.

“We’re going to be on this ship for nearly a month more.” Thomas points out. “One of you will have to eventually give in and speak to each other.”

Silver turns his head and gazes back at him, amusement in his eyes. “If you think we’re not capable of keeping this silence up for the entirety of the voyage, then you severely underestimate the both of us.”

 _Why is he drawn so to stubborn irascible men?_ Thomas rubs his temples. It doesn’t solve the ache growing there.

“The both of you are ridiculous.” He takes a book from his bag under the bunk and stretches out with it.

Silver sighs. “I know.”

*  *  *

There’s a brisk step in the corridor and Flint enters the cabin, closing the door a little harder than necessary.

Thomas looks up from the page immediately. “What is it?”

“There’s…a ship sighted off to the west.” James mutters. “The captain wanted all passengers to go below.” From the way he’s shifting restlessly this way and that, Thomas knows he’s not happy with the order.

“Pirate?” Silver swings his leg over to sit up, facing James.

“They don’t know yet.” James answers curtly. He paces the tiny room, hands clenched at his side.

“So we stay down here and then what?” Thomas asks. He doesn’t miss the look exchanged between James and Silver. It’s one of shared anticipation, of readiness.

And in that instance Thomas has an idea of what it will take to join them together once more. Something of their shared history, something they could fight side by side. Of course he wishes a pirate attack wouldn’t be the cause of reconciliation, but if that’s what it takes, Thomas could live with that.

James merely goes over to his bunk. He reaches into his bag and draws out his pistol.

Thomas straightens up. “James.”

“I’m not letting a pirate ship get in within a hundred years of this vessel.” James says, checking his pistol.

Silver pushes himself to his feet. “I’m going too.”

“You’ll stay exactly where you are.” James orders, without looking at him.

Silver stares at him incredulously. _“What?”_

“You’re staying the fuck below deck.” James then draws a dagger from his bag as well.

“Just how many weapons do you have stashed in there?” Thomas inquires. It makes sense to protect themselves, but this seems somewhat extreme. “You don’t even know for certain that it’s a pirate ship.”

“If you think I’m staying down here while you,” Silver begins.

“You’re staying down here with Thomas.” James cuts him off. “And that’s a fucking order. I need the both of you to be safe.”

Without another word he stalks out of the cabin, closing the door behind him.

Silver stares after him. “The fuck did he say that for?”

Thomas has his own idea, but he keeps it to himself, especially as he heard what Silver has not. The sound of the bolt being slid home. His heart sinks.

“Fuck that.” Silver grabs his own pistol and heads for the door. He reaches for the handle. It doesn’t budge. He tries it again, but there’s no give. 

Silver stares at it in disbelief. “He locked us in. He _fucking_ locked us in.” He swings around to stare accusingly at Thomas. “Did you hear me?”

“I believe he thought that was the only way we’d heed his wishes.” Thomas says carefully. There’s a pang in his chest at what James has done, why he’s done it, what Silver doesn’t see yet.

Silver raises his arm to pound on the door. “You bastard, let us out!”

The noise is lost in the whistle and boom from up on deck.

Thomas pales at the sound of cannon fire. James is up there and while he was a formidable pirate, they have been living in relative peace and calm for six months now. Anything could happen. He goes over to the porthole, trying to see anything, but there’s no view, just the broad open sea.

“Damn him.”

Silver slumps against the door. “I’m going to fucking kill him.”

At the moment Thomas finds himself in agreement with Silver.

 *  *  *

It feels like forever before the cannon fire finally fades and there’s silence up above. At last there’s footsteps in the corridor again. The bolt is slowly undone. By this time Silver has moved to sit on his bunk, facing the door, waiting. Thomas leans against the wall, his arms folded tightly across his chest, also watching the door.

It opens and James enters. There’s smoke and gunpowder on his face, but no sign of blood or injury. Thomas’s heart settles safely in place within his chest, beating in time again. And then the anger rises up, fresh and hot at what James had done.

James looks at the both of them and closes the door behind him. “I know you’re angry.” He begins.

Silver surges upright. “What gives you the fucking right?”

“I thought it was only fair.” James says coolly. “Me deciding your fate for once.”

Silver swings at him and James catches his fist, shoving him back hard.

Silver stumbles, bracing himself with his crutch. When he looks up, his eyes are murderous. “Don’t you _dare_ compare that to this.”

“Don’t speak of _that!_ ” James shouts back. “You fucking shit.”

“You had no fucking right.” Silver hisses, moving forward again.

“Stop this at once, the both of you.” Thomas’s voice cuts sharply through the melee and they both freeze.

“John.” Thomas starts with him. “While James no doubt has a valid point, that’s something the two of you will need to discuss, as you have needed to discuss it since starting this voyage. You will have that conversation sooner rather than latter. And as for you,” He turns to look at James with furious eyes. “Whatever is between the two of you, it does not give you the right to decide what to do. For him, or for me. Is that understood?”

“Thomas…”

“Is that understood?” Thomas’s voice rings out imperious and commanding. It’s the voice of his past, that long ago life in London. He hasn’t spoken like that in years and James stiffens, as he always does when he hears it.

Without a word he turns and leaves the cabin.

“Shit.” Thomas says succinctly. He leaves Silver there for the moment and goes after him.

 *  *  *

“James, _James_.” Thomas comes up to him by the railing. He takes a breath, looking around to make sure there’s none of the crew around to listen to them. 

He gets a look at the deck.

The guns were used, Thomas knows that, but no one is dead, from what he can see. Still, the disorder as the sailors set everything  on the ship back to rights, make him wince. 

He turns his attention back to James. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that.” He had never held his rank over James, not intentionally.

“You’re apologizing to me after what I did?” James says quietly.

“One action doesn’t negate the necessity of an apology for another.” Thomas says just as quietly. He turns his own gaze out to the gray quiet sea. “For the last ten years, other people decided my fate every single day. What I ate, when I slept, when I worked. Long before that my actions were dictated by my father. I can’t have that anymore, James. I _can’t_. Even if it’s for my own good, I have to make those decisions for myself. Can you understand that?”

“Of course I can.” James bursts out vehemently. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Thomas. I never…meant to. I don’t know what happened. The thought of an attack just overcame any rational thought. I couldn’t bear the thought of anything happening to you and Silver.”

The pang hits Thomas again, and he knows in that moment what James himself knows, but hasn’t admitted aloud, what Silver is refusing to even acknowledge. One of them will break, and he just hopes it won’t be irreparable when it happens.

James shudders softly. He reaches blindly for Thomas, fisting a handful of his shirt. “I need you.”

“James.” They’re on deck, and it’s hardly the place, nor the time. The ship isn’t convenient. None of this is convenient. But the look in James’s eyes lights a fire in Thomas, a fire that he doesn’t want to extinguish. He’s tired of hiding, of having to think first before acting.  

“Come with me.” He draws James down below deck. They make it down to the corridor where James kisses the back of his neck with feverish need, causing Thomas to shiver with want.

Anyone could see them, anyone could come below, and they would be caught. “We have to get inside.”

He shoves the door to the cabin open, dragging James inside with him and pauses at the sight of Silver who’s still sitting there, looking at him.

“James.” Thomas hesitates.

James’s hand grips his shirt so tightly Thomas feels the rasp of James’s nails against his skin. “Let him see.” He says roughly, and kisses Thomas, pushing him up against the door and bolting it from the inside.

Thomas moans into his mouth. “James.” Is this really fair to Silver?

He turns his face and meets Silver’s gaze, searching for some sign that Silver is all right with this happening. There’s a burning intensity in Silver’s eyes as he looks at them. He gives Thomas a barely imperceptible nod. So Thomas goes ahead, reaching for James’s breeches and underclothes, pushing them down to his thighs.

James groans, leaning against him, his cock pressing against Thomas’s clothed groin. “I want you inside me.” He whispers into Thomas’s ear.

Silver draws in a sharp breath.

Thomas grips his bare ass hard. “What happened up there?” He asks.

“You want to know that now?” James groans again as Thomas’s fingers slide along the cleft of his ass.

“Yes.” It’s Silver who answers and James turns his head to look sharply at him.

He looks back at Thomas for confirmation.

“You heard him.” Thomas says. He presses the tip of his forefinger against James’s hole. “So tell us.”

“I convinced the captain he needed to frighten off the ship before they got too close.” There’s a hitch in James’s breath as the pad of Thomas’s finger rubs him just there. “And it worked.”

Thomas presses James up against the cabin wall, spreading his thighs as he searches for something, anything.

“There’s oil in my pack.” Silver mutters.

James eyes him over Thomas’s shoulder. “Fetch it.”

Silver gets out the oil and brings it over to him. His hand brushes James’s, fingertips to fingertips, and then he moves away, back to his bunk.

“Spread your legs and continue.” Thomas says as he slicks his finger.

“I said it worked. That’s all.” James murmurs as Thomas eases his finger into him once more.

“He let you command his men, didn’t he?” Silver leans forward, waiting for James’s answer.

“Y-yes.” James manages as Thomas eases nearly his entire finger straight up to the knuckle inside him.

“And how did that feel?” Silver asks casually, as though he already knows the answer.

“We’re alive, aren’t we?” James retorts and then gasps as Thomas adds a second finger.

Silver just smiles. “You’ve missed it, haven’t you?”

“Shut up.” James says. “Thomas. _Now_.”

“Turn around and face the wall then.” Thomas removes his fingers and straightens up, tugging his own breeches down in his haste. He slicks his cock and positions himself between James’s legs.

He thrusts into James with a faint gasp, trying to make no noise, but unable to hold back entirely. James reaches over his shoulder to grasp Thomas by the side of the neck, turning his head so that he can reach Thomas’s mouth.

Thomas grips his hips moving faster, rutting into him. It’s rough and too fast, he wants to slow it down, but James needs this and if he’s honest, he needs it too. There will be time for taking it slow. Another day. Now there’s just this.

And then James turns his head to gaze directly at Silver. “This is why you reunited us. Admit it.” James punctuates his words with pressing his hips back against Thomas’s cock. “ _This. Is. Why_.”

“Yes.” Silver’s eyes glitter with savage satisfaction. “It is.” He’s not remotely apologetic or penitent about it. 

James gasps as Thomas slides nearly all the way out and then back inside, hot and quick and rough. He’s moving faster now, making James pant with each thrust. Then Thomas reaches around to wrap a hand around James.

“Did you enjoy it?”

“I was fucking worried.” James’s head sinks between his palms as he braces himself against the wall with both hands.

“I know.” Thomas says softly, still moving in him. “Did you enjoy it?”

James shudders. He risks another look at Silver who just smirks at him. “Yes.” He admits at last.

Thomas fists his cock harder and James comes helpless and gasping, shooting over Thomas’s curled fingers.

Thomas kisses the back of his neck as he finishes, tasting James’s sweat, burying his nose in James’s hair.

They lean against each other, steadying each other in their arms and then Thomas eases out of him.

James turns and grasps his face, kissing him thoroughly, his tongue entreating Thomas for more and then he draws back. There’s a sated, tranquil look to his eyes that Thomas loves.

“Thank you.” James strokes his thumb along Thomas’s cheek. He smiles as he draws up his breeches.

Thomas gives him a smile in return. He starts to draw up his own breeches and then pauses as he notices James inching towards the door. “Oh, no you don’t.”

“I just need some fresh air.” James mutters. “That’s all.”

“Tell him.” Thomas insists, standing there still half nude, his hands on his hips. “Tell him what you told me, what you said in this bloody cabin before you locked us in.” _Tell him so he understands, damn you, James._ He let that just happen because Silver was all right with it, but he’ll be damned if he lets this continue to simmer between the two of them.

James sighs, but his shoulders slump slightly in acceptance of the fact that this can’t go on. “I did it because I couldn’t bear to think of anything happening to you, either of you.” He lets that settle in the air as he gazes straight at Silver.

“Yes you said that,” Silver pauses as he thinks about it, really thinks about it. His eyes widen a little and James licks his lips apprehensively. Silver looks at Thomas for a long moment, and then back at James. “That’s certainly a weird way to say I love you.” He says finally.

There’s a challenge there, daring James to confront him, to deny it, to pretend that isn’t why.

James straightens his shoulders and juts his chin up. “No stranger than exiling me to reunite me with Thomas.” He counters.

Silver’s smile is serene, but his eyes are faintly pained. “Perhaps we need to work on it.” He murmurs. He glances at Thomas, his expression a little more tentatively hopeful now. “That night in the cabin…” His eyes dart back to James, waiting to see what Thomas will say.

“…would have been perfect if James had been there.” Thomas finishes. He’s growing more attuned to Silver’s thoughts, anticipating the paths they will take.

Silver nods, his eyes calming in relief.  

Thomas sighs. “I’m exhausted. I need some sleep.”

“It’s the middle of the afternoon.” James points out.

“And we have at least two hours till it’s time for dinner.” Thomas says. He doesn’t have energy for anything more right now. He reaches for the blankets from each of their bunks, as well as their cloaks. James watches him as he builds a makeshift bed on the floor.

Thomas glances up at James. “Come on.”

With a sigh James sits down beside him, but Silver remains where he is on the bunk. “You too.” Thomas says, patting the blankets between him and James.

“Are you sure?” Silver asks.

“Just come down here already.” James sounds faintly irritable and Thomas is about to remind him to be polite when he sees how Silver’s already sliding off the bunk in response. 

Thomas lies with his back against the wall, settling Silver between him and James. This, for right now, feels right. Silver shifts his position slightly, his back towards James, facing Thomas.

Thomas closes his eyes. Suddenly he’s very tired. He doesn’t want to think of what could have happened if the pirates had decided to attack instead of retreat. He doesn’t want to consider all the ways this day could have ended.

James hesitates, and then he moves closer, his hand resting on Silver’s thigh as though he’s testing the waters. “I know we need to speak, but can we let that wait till tomorrow?”

“I can live with that.” Silver exhales.

He gazes at Thomas lying there, looking so peaceful.

“I’m still not happy with France.” Silver mutters.

“Too bad.” James murmurs. His thumb strokes gently over Silver’s thigh, just the slightest motion of touch.

“You still haven’t kissed me.” Silver points out. “I don’t think you get to say anything more until you do.”

“Is that right?” James murmurs.

Thomas sighs. “James, for the love of god, just kiss him.”

“Or what?”

“Or I will.” Thomas curls a hand over Silver’s stomach without opening his eyes.

James chuckles, and for that Thomas opens his eyes. He lies there, watching as James leans over Silver, cupping his jaw in his hand, Silver gazing up at him with bare hopeful want in his eyes.

James doesn’t speak, he merely lowers his mouth to Silver’s, a slow entreaty of a kiss, that has no need of persuasion as Silver’s lips part with equal desire and his hand reaches up to curve along James’s back.

Thomas smiles and closes his eyes again.

Yes, he decides his original assessment was correct. This voyage will prove interesting indeed. He was also correct in it being a new beginning, for all three of them.


End file.
